Stella is 6

Stella is simply Stella. I've struggled to encapsulate the multitudes she holds. Her boisterous reserve. Her indulgence in life that can swing into distraught hesitation.  She untucks things into wild creation and disorder in her wake.  She is warmth with a bit of scorch. She holds so much beauty, intelligence, and emotion.  She is simply not simple and I love her incredibly for it. Today we celebrate a whole 6 years of this Stella girl.  

Stella is a deep thinker.  Her famous: 'I have a question...' line constantly announces that she's about to reveal a deep internal pondering, often having to do with the nuances of the human experience.  She often wonders who she is, and what makes us, us.

  

Stella picks up on small shifts in peoples moods and offers comfort or space to let the feeler feel their feelings.  However, sometimes digesting another's mood is one feeling too many for her beautifully sensitive soul.  She overflows into a growling beast when this happens. She'll spew and spray incoherently.   Silence and snuggles always overcomes her lashing out. It's an unfortunate dynamic that Finn is often over simulating and Stella is easily stimulated. 

Stella is constantly creating. She loves to feel and follow her heart. Stopping her flow to clean or organize is very difficult for her. Waves of overwhelm and intrusive thoughts of 'I can't!' plague her often.  The thoughts she chooses to believe about her experience are 100% worse than the actual experience and we are grappling as parents to try to teach her how to battle such an internal fight at such a young age. 

 We've been working especially hard lately to show Stella we are in her corner with picking up and pitching in around the home with family chores. Over dinner one night, out of nowhere, Stella turned to me and said: Mom, thank you so much for helping me with my chores.  You've been working really hard with me on it. That really means a lot to me. I appreciate it. I love you.' Her sincerity was so tangible that I held back tears.

Stella is very verbally affectionate and will wrap you up in a hug of affirmation often.  She notices your effort and is so good at letting you know she see's you and thinks you're awesome. She champions your passions, and empathizes with your struggles. 

This skill tips into venom at times, as when angry Stella will wad up words in a siege of complaints and insults.    She protests while her body still does the thing you've asked her to. We've learned to ignore the shower of word vomit and praise the movement of her actions instead. The apologies Stella will melt into when she is calm are almost always unprovoked. They are so sincere and emotionally aware. 

It is the upmost insult to Indie to be called a 'Baby!' by Stella.  They don't fight often, but when this insult is spewed you know that things have just gotten very serious indeed. 

When the wind whips and the rain pelts Stella sheds her clothes and tares off into nature.  Head back, arms open and spread to the sky she will soak in the moment. The perfect picture of peace.  She indulges so completely into her feelings that it makes me feel alive to witness.  She prefers bare feet and naked skin to lead her into every experience in this world. 

Stella has a great tenderness for animals and will often be found with a bug of some sort. In the warmer months it's not uncommon to be walking inside and cross paths with a lost rolly polly. We tip our hats and smile at what fun it is to be a guest in Stella's world. 

Stella applies obscene amounts of tape to any and all crafts.  She breaths it like air and will begrudgingly use staples when we inevitably run out. We often find the tape dispenser in her bed tangled in sheets and stuffed animals. 

Stella doesn't seem to love video games, board games, or vegetables. She stills struggles with some speech sounds and with tongue thrust. She gets car sick often and has a very hard time dealing with sensory things on her feet. (Socks and shoes are very hard to figure out when a beloved shoe has to be retired and we shop for something again.) 

She hates being alone, and hearing of others hurting. She does not like talking about her feelings or events that have transpired. She is very private with her inner world.   She will wall up in sass, indifference and rage when hurt. She has a low threshold for discomfort, emotional or physical unless she puts her mind to it, and then the biggest hurt in the world can't touch her.

Stella loves hatchimals, orange kitty, her family, her bestie Melba, treats (no bakes and brownies to be exact), playing pretend, snuggles, riding her bike, being at home, wearing beautiful things and seeing beautiful things. She is our most flexible, and easy going child in this season. She loves to sleep in the same bed as Indie. She has wit and cracks us up daily with her one liners. 

Like when she told us in utter despair that we had prepared her for 'a haunted house, not a haunted everywhere,' over the Halloween season. Or when Finn told her, 'you're my best sister Stella!' while Stella was coloring and unbothered she responded, 'I like to hear that.' 

She scavenges and hordes lost crayons at school to the point that the classroom rules had to shift to tone down her overflowing cubby.  She loves nothing more than to be understood and loved. 

 A glimpse into our 6 year old Stella girl!

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