Myra's Pregnancy

My pregnancy with Myra was a long one.  Damon and I had decided we were done having children.  We'd prayed and discussed, journaled and meditated, for years over this decision, and found ourselves a place of peace. We both felt a calm with ending our family with three children. So moving forward Damon scheduled a vasectomy. And that was the week I found out I was pregnant. 

I'd catch glimpses of joy where I could feel the beauty this unexpected change could bring. But it was so hard to grasp as I mourned the future I'd envisioned for our family. Amid crippling morning sickness, and severe SPD I felt very trapped emotionally (and physically) over the course of 9 months. 

I had incredibly supportive friends and family that left me space to feel everything I felt despite us all knowing the ending. The only possible ending. A deep sigh, a deep breath of gratitude that this baby had come into our family.  Knowing that was the future and allowing space for the present difficulty was a kindness I really appreciated in those around me. 

As always, Damon was incredibly supportive and tried his best to fill the spaces I let drop as I processed and gestated. He was still working 2 jobs throughout almost the entire pregnancy. Which was difficult (some days) for all involved. 

We slowly bought back all the baby gear we'd sold. We told the kids a baby was on the way.  They were ecstatic.  Each child consistently prayed that the baby would be healthy and come into our family.

Myra always startled at my bodies pops and creaks. I think that was one of the most unique things about her pregnancy, aside from the surprise, shock and incredibly difficult morning sickness and pelvic pain.